Sunday, August 12, 2012

Finding the Happy in Disappointment

Finding the happy in disappointment. That doesn't sound like a fun activity. It seems more like a task if anything. Most people, including myself, do not wish to focus on something that has brought disappointment to our lives. I, for one, would rather ignore it and try to move past whatever it was that disappointed me. What I am finding instead is that I can really only do just that - try - without ever really getting anywhere.

If I don't ignore it, then I easily dwell on my disappointment, the things I was hopeful of, expected out of life, only to be let down. Dwelling on it pulls on emotion and a vicious cycle ensues, filled with anger, hurt, justification, sadness, and overall pain. If this is my only other option besides ignoring it, then I would rather never look at the disappointment again.

Recently, I was dealt a series of disappointments in my own life. I immediately vacillated between my two usual options of ignoring it or dwelling on it. After doing a little of both and still feeling no satisfaction, I was at a loss. I didn't know what to do, but I did know that neither of these things worked, and it was slowly choking the life out of my, well, life.
My cousin, Bella, on her first birthday- definitely found her happy!

I was talking to a close friend of mine, one who has had her own series of disappointments in life yet finds a way to make peace with it and move on. I hadn't had a particularly trying day, but I was still feeling the weight of dissatisfaction. She sent me a text, and it said, "Find the happy in your life. Go for a drive in your car (I do have a fun car), get a drink (Vanilla Dr. Pepper from Sonic), or splurge on a movie you've been wanting."

Of course, we both know happiness isn't found just in the things of this world. However, we do have what I like to call "the small things in life," those things which lift our spirits enough to see the positive in what has discouraged us. And from there we can hopefully begin to see "the happy" in our disappointment, the things that are worth living for.